Our House Is a Very, Very, Very Fine House

Sparkles were ubiquitous. Musicians were grand as the piano. The house was packed. Music from movies filled the aisles, and quizzes for the audience kept the crowd on their toes. (How many “Pink Panther” movies were made? Would you recognize James Bond’s theme?) “Moon River” had folks crooning in their seats, and the emcee left everyone laughing.

Not in New York City. Not in Philly. Residents of White Horse Village dreamed up, produced and performed a rollicking show that ended in applause heard throughout the building.

Before you think life as a senior is short on hopes and dreams, talk to a few members of 55+ communities … if you can reach them with their busy schedules.

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This …

Tom, a resident of White Horse Village, proposed that people enter the vibrant senior continuing care retirement community (CCRC) in Newtown Square and play out their dreams three ways. Some continue what they love and realize their dreams at the campus surrounded by a hundred tranquil acres. Others encounter and experience new worlds and passions. Still others discover that their lifelong skills and knowledge are the missing piece in collective dreams — they use them to bring about the community’s dreams.

Barbara, a White Horse resident for 35 years, has succeeded at all three. At 62, she entered the community with her mother — a healthy, active nonagenarian — and her beloved dog. She asked if, after her Westie died, she could get another dog. White Horse said yes. Her dream was fulfilled when Sonsie joined her. After Sonsie died, Barbara pupsat other dogs in the “Village.” She’s also volunteered for the Brandywine Conservancy.

“I saw White Horse as a place for us to grow and be happy,” she said.

When I’m 64

What song characterizes your dreams for the future and the home and community you choose? The Beatles’ “When I’m 64,” Beethoven’s “Ode to Joy,” anything by Enya, Jimmy Buffett’s “Margaritaville,” Pink Floyd’s “Great Gig in the Sky” or something else? I asked several people 55+ to name that song and describe how the lyrics characterized the lifestyle they sought in their senior community.

Answers ranged from lyrics addressing the basic reasons for their move to hopes and dreams for new pursuits to try.

“You’ll Never Walk Alone” from the musical “Carousel.” “You’re giving your kids the gift that they won’t have to worry about you,” Tom said about moving into a community for aging in place. When he and his wife were moving to White Horse, it struck them that the song was about having people to help them. “We wanted our family walking alongside us, but not having to carry us.”

“Our House” by Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. Linda, who cherishes her farm with animals and flowers, is on Kendal at Longwood’s waiting list. Her mother hadn’t planned for her final years, and Linda wanted a better situation for her children. She looked for a place with plenty of nature and where she could “place the flowers in the vase.” The CCRC — surrounded by acres of land and adjacent to Longwood Gardens where there are more than “two cats in the yard” — fit the bill. The lyrics also reflected the amazing care she had witnessed there, including skilled nursing: “Life used to be so hard. Now everything is easy ’cause of you.”

“Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” Laurie said she’s “living in the land of the unknowns now” as she waits for a spot at Crosslands. So, she looks forward to the time and place “where troubles melt like lemon drops” — dreams of stability and positive possibilities for the next chapter in her life. “And maybe there’s a pot of gold at the end,” she added.

Almost Heaven

When the weather’s nice, listen for the band. Then look for Pat and Jim at Hershey’s Mill’s new Village Green. They’ve dropped their covered dish and favorite bottled beverages at the new shelter and picnic tables before settling into lawn chairs in time for a concert. They love music, whether listening to the Elderberries at a summer event, or singing along to covers of Billy Joel, the Beach Boys and others. They also love the camaraderie of the gatherings with their neighbors — one of their hopes when they moved to the 55+ community.

“We wanted a place where we felt comfortable, we belonged and there were lots of options for activities,” said Pat. They found that in that West Chester community for independent seniors.

In their previous longtime home, as their neighbors’ children and theirs embarked on lives of their own, and as families with younger children moved into the neighborhood, they had less in common with neighbors, added Jim. They found commonalities with Hershey’s Mill residents while attending happy hours, volunteering at the library and enjoying nature trails. They also found people to count on when they needed help.

I Know I’ll Often Stop and Think About Them … in My Life

According to Devon Higbee, sales manager at Granite Farms Estates, seniors look for a place that can nurture mind, body and soul without worrying about home tasks and responsibilities, and where friends and neighbors will help them live their best life. Not surprisingly, seniors’ families and loved ones want that for them, too.

Higbee works at the same CCRC where her grandmother lived. “It helps to know your loved one is taken care of, pursuing new passions they didn’t even know existed, in a new chapter of life,” Higbee said. Formerly a crafter, her grandmother discovered card-making. “Every holiday I got a handmade card,” she recalled fondly.

At Granite Farms, resident-greeters invite newcomers to activities. Open house events show and share options. An activities calendar displays details, and residents can access meeting information through an app. Residents can try whatever appeals, including polishing stones and making jewelry at the lapidary studio.

Food, Glorious Food

Laurie said she calculated the number of dinners she’d prepared throughout her life. 17,000! Like many seniors, one of the dreams for community living is entering a dining room where food is already prepared and someone else cleans up.

If Shoo-fly Pie and Apple Pan Dowdy make your stomach say “Howdy,” as the folk song goes, neighboring Lancaster County might be your place.

In Lititz, Luther Acres meets seniors’ physical, emotional and spiritual needs as well as dreams as they change over time. It offers choices in eating venues — casual restaurant-style, café and pub, and others. Look for healthy meals with locally sourced ingredients and regional favorites.

Opening in 2029, Mosaic in the heart of Lancaster City is offering 20 stories of sunny windows and 146 distinctive apartments with resort-style amenities, restaurants and retail for active 55+ adults. For a menu of activities within quick walking distance, check the view from just one of those sunny windows. Pop down to Lancaster’s Central Market, known for crazy-good stroopwafels and crowd-watching. There’s also easy access to cultural events, banking and medical appointments, in addition to vast options for happenings within the building. Mosaic is a life plan community with solutions as needs for more assistance and care arise.

Changes

Seniors note that changes are perpetual. Lifestyle, dreams and priorities differ with corresponding physical abilities, memory capacity and energy. “After being at Hershey’s Mill for 10 years, we’re not on the pickleball court like we were once,” said Jim. “We still play bocce, but we’re not competing.” Others talked about retaining their love of books, but switching to larger print and audio versions.

“There are a million little things that become really big things when you can’t do them yourself,” said Tom. “The people who are happiest see that and accept it.” They concurred: community matters more as time goes on.

Yet for Barbara, one fundamental thing doesn’t waver. “The desire to serve sticks as you get older. How people do that might change, but there is still the desire to give back.”

Laurie said she deeply considers what lies ahead. “It’s comfortable and natural to think about the full circle of life. I think of adventure and community. Or as I age maybe I’ll cocoon and quiet down.”

She continued, “As I look at the future, it’s like a chapter in the book. In that chapter is adventure and good things. I won’t have responsibility. There will be a shift in what brings me joy. Rather than feeling overly sad about it, that next chapter could be fabulous. I believe it will be.”

Open the door. Your dreams await in a very, very, very fine house.